About Aypril + The Heretical Heart™
You were never meant to contort yourself into someone else's idea of who you should be.
If your body has ever screamed no while your mouth said "sure, that's fine," you already know why you're here.
I'm Aypril Porter. Human Design Guide, published author, professional pattern-breaker, and the girl who wore a pink tutu, green army boots, and liberty spikes to prom and was told she ruined it. She didn't. She made it unforgettable.
That energy never left. I just stopped apologizing for it.
What I Actually Do
You've hit the point where the kids are older, the career's settled, and you're standing in the middle of a life you built exactly as planned, thinking: okay. Now what?
Where did the excitement go? Where did the joy go? Where did you fucking go?
I work with the woman who still has an ember burning low in her gut, the same fire she used to trust without question and take chances from. Somewhere along the way she traded it for a life of beige sameness. I work with her the moment she's done pretending beige was ever enough.
The part no one talks about.
When you realize you've been performing most of your adult life and you're ready to stop, it's scary. Because you're letting go of a version of yourself that kept you safe, that worked, that people counted on. She deserves more than just being discarded.
Most programs skip straight to the after-photo. The rebirth, the glow-up, the triumphant reveal. Nobody shows you the part where you have to actually grieve her first.
The woman you're releasing was real. She served a purpose. If we don't make space for what comes up as she steps back, you'll spend the rest of your life dragging her behind you like a suitcase you never unpacked.
The grief comes first. I'm not here to rush you through it, and I'm not here to pretend it isn't there just because most people find it too uncomfortable to sit with. I'll sit with it. That's the actual work.
Built for the Underworld
This isn't the first time I've had to rebuild myself from nothing. It won't be the last.
I have an 8th house Stellium, including my sun, a 29th-degree moon sitting at the exact threshold between what's ending and what hasn't begun yet, and a Scorpio Midheaven, because even my career path was always going to run through the underworld. My Core Wound and my Vocation, in Gene Keys, both land on Gate 42: the gate of endings and completion. Losing a version of myself and rebuilding from what's left isn't something that happens to me occasionally. It's built into my design. Twice.
I don't just tolerate the underworld. I'm built for it.
My Human Design parenting book has reached thousands of families, and it taught me something I bring into every session: the conditioning that shapes how we parent is the same conditioning running the rest of our adult lives. Different room, same pattern.
For years I thought that made me the problem. What I was actually doing was trying to connect with people who weren't ready to go that deep.
Who This Work Is For
Women who are sharp, self-aware, and exhausted from trying to fix something that was never the problem, just misread.
People who lead with their values and can't figure out why that keeps feeling like a liability instead of an asset.
Anyone who has done the mindset work, the strategy work, the inner work, and is still sitting in the parking lot crying into their $7 latte, wondering why nothing has shifted.
Women at midlife who can feel something changing and don't have language for it yet, but know they're done pretending it isn't happening.
You don't need to know anything about Human Design to work with me. You just need to be done playing roles you never actually agreed to.
Women who are done saying "I can't." What they actually mean is "I'm ready to host the funeral for the identity I never even fucking agreed to, the one I built quietly, one innocent-seeming decision at a time.
If You Found Me Through the Parenting Work…
The Human Design Parenting Book and Workbook are still alive because the journey to reclaiming your own design often starts with understanding how you were shaped as a child, and if that's where you came in, welcome; the work just got more personal.
This is deconditioning as rebellion. And a homecoming to yourself.
Check out my Human Design parenting books
Whether you're raising kids, reparenting yourself, or untangling the patterns you inherited, this is where a lot of people find me first.
“Aypril doesn’t give you more strategy. She sees the pattern underneath your strategy.
In one session, she helped me untangle what I’d been overcomplicating for months. I stopped second guessing myself. I stopped over-explaining. I finally trusted my own design.
My business feels like mine again.”
— Client M.P.
Listen to the current Heretical Heart Podcast episode ⤵
Want to listen to Podcasts I’ve been invited to? ⤵
Heretical Truths
These aren’t affirmations.
They’re permission slips. Clarity cues. Unlearning invitations for the ones building a different way.
“Strategy isn’t supposed to feel like self-abandonment.”
“If you have to numb yourself to sell it, it’s not the thing.”
“What you’re afraid of losing by doing it your way isn’t even yours to keep.”
“You don't have to believe harder. You have to stop pretending."
“You’re not too sensitive. You’re too honest to perform.”
“The version of you that already knows — that's the one we're building from."
“What you build from self-trust will always outlast what you build from fear.”
“Manifesting from someone else's design is just hoping in disguise."
“Life gets simpler when you stop living it for other people.”
If you feel called out reading these, I'm calling you in.